What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?
12.06.2025 00:48
Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.
Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)
Shameless vixen! Trollop!
Do straight guys like to see cocks?
At least until the peyote kicks in ...
Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.
And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.
In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …
Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!
Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?
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Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!
Make Nazis afraid again!
Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.
But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!
Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.
In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …
What's your take on Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind? How has it affected you?
I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.
Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!
After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.
Why won't Canada build their own fighter jet?
Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.
Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.
Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!
Why do men like to have sex with a woman's ass?
Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.
And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...
Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority
Why are there so many single moms in America?
I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.
Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …
Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.
Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.
Marijuana makes Jesus cry!
¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!
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Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.
Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!
“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”
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